Don’t Take It Personal | The Opinions of Loved Ones.

Bonjour mes amies! Content creation has taught me life skills I never knew I needed.

For the sake of time, we’ll focus on one in this blog, the opinions of loved ones.

When I first began Cappuccinos and Consignment, it was solely a hobby. I’d recently remarried and moved further away from my job. To avoid resenting my new commute and beaucoup other life changes, I decided to fill my commute avec sharing my random thoughts and experiences. A dear cousin of mine had been telling me to blog since I lived in Istanbul, Turkey.

I truly didn’t think anyone would be interested in what a globe-trotting black girl from S.E, D.C was doing in her day-to-day life. Had I known then what I know now, I would have spent my time at internet cafes blogging versus getting the latest Stateside tea via AOL messenger.

On 1 Feb 2019, my dear cousin (who told me to blog years ago) dropped what she was doing and came to my home when I told her that I finally wanted to create a blog. Over deux bottles of champagne, she helped me create a webpage that I haphazardly named “Cappuccinos and Consignment.”

At that moment, I had no clue what was to come. Click here for my first blog post.

Paid campaigns avec brands, hosting traveling shopping experiences avec mes amies, giving a Masterclass at a prestigious French university, and so much more, all because I finally decided to share my day-to-day life and experiences avec the world.

When I realized that Cappuccinos and Consignment was becoming more than a hobby, doubt, fear, and beaucoup, other feelings started to fill my mind.

Could I make a living off of being me?

Naturally, I began to have these discussions avec ma famille, and at the beginning, everyone thought that I’d gone MAD.

Every worst-case scenario was mentioned, and I began to internalize the fears and uncertainties of those I loved.

I began feeling hurt, insecure and confused.

Do the ones I love not have faith in me?

I began to question.

It wasn’t until a fourteen-hour flight to Dubai that I realized that I shouldn’t take it personally.

I am surrounded by nothing but love and support, and with that, those who love me want nothing but the best pour moi.

I soon realized that I was asking those who loved me to visualize what they had never seen.

Right now, can you picture what a qzanatpth looks like?

If you can…

Because I’ve clearly made that word up. The point being, if you’ve never seen or have zero point of reference to a particular word, smell, texture, or thought, it’s impossible to imagine.

Those who (truly, without question or envy) love you will always want to ensure that you have, if nothing else, the basic necessities of life. When your ideas or goals seemingly put said conditions in question, loved ones who have no point of reference of ever seeing someone do what you are envisioning, may (auto) response in a very primal fashion; invoking doubt and fear.

This is especially true with families of color.

I have never shied away from having authentic racial conversations, and I won’t now.

The fact is, people of color and, more specifically, people of color who were raised in impoverished communities have never had space to dream. We have always had to function in a state of survival.

Finding ourselves and/or following our dreams is a luxury that many were not afforded.

I would never suggest “moving in silence” because if you can accomplish all of your goals singlehandedly, your goals aren’t big enough.

I suggest you protect your heart and mind and not let the opinions of people who have never seen anyone do what you desire to do deter you.

It’s not that your loved ones don’t believe in you (in most cases); it’s that many cannot understand what they have never seen.

Plan accordingly, do the work, and always stay the course mes amies.

Your dreams can become a reality, irrespective of who understands them, right now.

Ciao for now 💋


  1. Kenyatta

    Thanks for sharing… and I’m glad you stuck with it (and listened to your cousin 😉). I love the blog and Instagram feed, they keep my dream of making Paris a part of my life (traveling their often) and feed my appetite for fashion! 💚

  2. Paulette “Poppy” Robinson

    Why am I talking back to the blog and responding to the “drop the mic” key points you make?!?… Thanks for sharing your heart Jessie.. as you continue to stay persistent in your authenticity. It’s making an impact on many of us.

    Sincerely, @poppyfair

    • Paulette “Poppy” Robinson

      * @poppyfairy

    • Product_snob

      What an awesome word on this Sunday evening im so excited and ready to start I’ll buy the virtual champagne are you ready to create?. Hugs to you seour 💖🤗

    • An interactive blog! I am HERE FOR IT!!! I thank you so much! I was SOOOOOO afraid to publish this blog. I had no clue how it would be received. Knowing that I’m not alone and that my experiences helped others was exactly what I needed.

  3. Miss Chocolate

    Thank you for the inspiring and factual words. This blog post today was a whole vibe for me. I’m in the planning stages of my next life chapter and the loving negativity is in full affect!! While I know they mean no harm, it can be difficult to navigate. I have begun to be more selective about whom I share my dreams and goals with, it’s hard but for the best. Thank you for being you and inspiring little old me. Be blessed 🤗

    • Myrnie Standifer

      I wish in 1979 when I was about to graduate from HS I could have read this. I wanted to go to school for fashion merchandising and create the NYC macys windows. My mother, my biggest supporter, thought that was not a job that would support me. Mom meant well and I went to traditional college. But here I am at 61 still craving fashion and travel, wanted to visit France too, living vicariously through influencers still wanting to do something.
      I’m babbling now…lol. Thank you for sharing this with us. I am glad I found you. Blessings to your continued journey of success.

    • I’m so excited about your next chapter. Finding a small group or even one person you can share your dreams with is SUCH a powerful thing. You’ve found your tribe ma amour ❤️

  4. u hit the nail on the head w/not having the space to dream! The Baby Boomers fed us w/continuing the cycle of overly working n not taking risk in order to stay “safe n stable”. In the DMV, getting a “good gubment job” is making it. Making a living out of anything artsy isn’t anything they could fathom. I do understand it-we gotta be open to changing w/the times n I am rooting for anyone who takes the leap of faith. Even if it doesn’t succeed as envisioned it’s not a fail-just a lesson learned to try again w/a revamp’d plan!

    • I absolutely LOVE the way you think! And you understand firsthand what growing up in the DMV is like. When you reached the “mecca” of success “the good gubment job” those who love you will (unknowingly) shame you for wanting more or different than the norm. We are the change makers!

  5. Krystal Pivato

    Thank you for this! So many people need to hear these words. When I took a leap of faith and pursued my dreams, I was not readily met with support. Especially also being a recently divorced mother of 1 at that time, my loved ones really could not fathom the moves I was trying to make. I even started to doubt and question myself. I even postponed my move a year. However, 3 years later, I am in a new country, making a living off of my passion, happily remarried and my daughter is blossoming and flourishing. Had I listened to the doubt and fear, I never would be building the foundation I’m building now. My daughter would never know what it’s like to live life on her own terms and have a legacy that means something to her. I’m still in the humble beginnings of that legacy, but to see it’s an actual possibility means so much to me. More people need to hear this message and I’m so grateful you’ve shared your journey with us!


    • *Runs around the sanctuary* I am grinning ear-to-ear reading your words. All things are possible, are you are living proof!

  6. Mosa

    Wooow. I can totally relate to what I’ve just read and deeply motivated and enthused by it. Our dreams are valid, if only we learn to listen and follow our hearts not others’.

  7. just_erin_here

    I love this article. When ever anyone follows a dream, something that brings them a smile, I want to follow along and cheer them on, every step of the way. I am loving every single step of your journey. Every single step. Keep walking sweet woman! <3

Leave a Reply