Bonjour mes amies!
Writing this post feels so good. I have missed blogging dearly. I am still on bloggers’ “maternity leave,” but I couldn’t resist.
This blog is apart of a series because price/luxury shaming is real:
In Part Un, “You should Be Ashamed of Yourself: Price Shaming,” I shared my very first experience with price shaming as a teenager.
In Part Deux: “You Should Be Ashamed of Yourself: Luxury Shaming in the Workplace,” I shared my familiarity with insulting comments in the workplace.
Click here for my stance on wearing luxury/designer goods in the workplace.
Throughout my blogging career, I’ve never shied away from speaking about my obsession with luxury goods and finances.
Not too long ago, I could only dream about shopping in Paris or having a bedroom converted to a closet to house my wardrobe. I never let myself forget my extremely humble beginnings.
When I first began sharing my life publicly via this blog and social media, comments that I’ve heard for so long offline became louder online.
“Her bags are probably fake.”
“Aren’t there more important things in life than flaunting what you have?”
“Only an insecure person would feel the need to own this much designer stuff, sad.”
“All those expensive bags and she probably has no money and a bunch of debt.”
I learned the hard way that I would have to develop très très thick skin if I wanted to remain and continue to grow in the blogger/social media/public space.
Most of the oppositional, false, and frankly stated tacky remarks I have received on and offline, I merely ignored. But for some reason, the uncouth financial comments, I couldn’t.
“All these expensive bags, and she probably has no money and a bunch of debt.”
Perhaps it’s my history of aggressively working my way out of poverty that makes me très très sensitive and protective over financial allegations.
I’ve reasoned that anyone who does not have personal access to someone else’s banking statements and make comments/assumptions that you: 1. Do not have savings, 2. Lack assets, 3. Spending above your means, is projecting their insecurities upon you.
Mes amies, you’d be shocked to discover just how many people feel/believe that they do not deserve luxury, and it has nothing to do with money.
I’ve met people who out-earn me tremendously who are afraid to not only purchase but step foot in the places I frequent. They are worried that they will be judged for spending such amounts or assume that they don’t “fit” in luxury spaces.
When people with these internal battles see me, see you loving and living your life boldly and luxuriously, it bothers them. I’ve also come to learn that anger and meanness are the easier of emotions to display.
Versus thinking or stating: “Wow, I wish I had the nerve to dress that way for work or wear (my)/designer items.” It’s much easier (and sadly socially acceptable) to say mean or resentful remarks.
“I’d rather go on a trip, buy a home or rental property instead of spending all of that money on a purse.” Is another statement I’ve heard along the way.
I use to keep my lips sealed when people expressed such opinions. Now I assure them that I confirm my tenant’s rent payment via my property manager while I’m en route to an international airport. Destination, Paris, of course.
Oui mes amies, you can spend the money and make money.
Never let anyone make you feel less than.
Merci beaucoup to the enchanting @ketoandcouture for this lovely conversation and blog idea.
Ciao for now 💋
Bravo Bravo! Well said as always, Jess. WELL SAID! You can spend the money AND make the money. GOSPEL
Merci ma chérie for always being a listening ear
I agree as you can’t take money with you when die, so why enjoy things now. Miss you.
I absolutely love this post series. Each time I read and reread it, it’s a reminder to keep doing me and be fabulous. It’s my money and I’ve worked hard to but where I am. I can spend my money on whatever I like. Also I don’t have to be ashamed or save wearing my luxury items when I’m around certain people because I’m afraid of they’re judgey comments. Thank you Jessie ❤️
I’m so proud of you, Shardé! It’s taken time for me to realize that someone will always have something to say. I finally learned that I should only focus on and listen to what I have to say about myself. If the current state of the world has taught us nothing else, we must love and live every moment filled with the things and people that bring us joy. Thank you so much for your support but most of all, your time. Ciao for now 💋